


i'd do it all again

by st00pid



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Getting Back Together, M/M, Phandom Little Pop, plp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-05-16 16:12:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5832106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/st00pid/pseuds/st00pid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two, he reminds himself. He finds it almost strange making a coffee for another person. </p>
            </blockquote>





	i'd do it all again

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/486982) by [healing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/healing/pseuds/healing). 



After spending almost a year sleeping without another person in his bed, the unused half always empty and cold, waking up warm next to Dan isn’t particularly easy to get used to.

While a couple of years ago Phil would have felt at ease, he almost feels claustrophobic – the bed is too small and he feels too big and he’s not sure whether it’s the presence of another person that’s throwing him off or the presence of his best friend. That, as well as the fact just a month ago, there were still boundaries and forced indifference and now that’s all gone. And that scares him – it'd be so easy just to fuck everything up again. Phil's still trying to trust Dan, but the fact that Dan can break him with a couple of words makes him more than uneasy – he doesn't want to be screwed over, not _again_.

Phil slips out of bed, careful not to wake Dan. Quietly, he pads into the kitchen, bare feet almost sticky against the tiled floor. Still lost in thought, he stacks the dirty cups on the counter and puts them in the sink to wash later before filling up the kettle with water to make coffee. As soon as he flicks the switch, he feels a hand on his shoulder and starts.

His hand smacks the handle of the cupboard drawer behind him and Phil lets out a small ‘ouch’. Turning around, he finds Dan snickering, a smirk across his face. 

“Shut up,” Phil mumbles halfheartedly. “It’s too early for animal abuse.”

“Good morning to you too,” Dan laughs. His voice is clouded with sleep.

Phil rolls his eyes as he reaches into the drawer of mugs. He grabs one out of habit before realising he should make one for Dan. _Two_ , he reminds himself. He finds it almost strange making a coffee for another person. 

“When I woke up and you weren't there, I thought you’d left, you know.” Dan says in an almost forcibly casual tone. Phil freezes.

“What do you mean?” he frowns. _In what sense_ , he means to say. He sets the mugs down on the counter.

“Like, _left_.” Dan admits quietly. “For real. Is it bad that that’s my first thought when you’re gone? I mean, I don’t have huge trust issues – like, Phil, I trust you with my life and shit, but you know? At the same time I do? Like, I wouldn’t be surprised if you just left without telling me. Instinctively, I’m still used to pushing you away and thinking worst case scenario and I–I’m still used to–how do I articulate this–thinking about myself? Just, there being one person? Do you get me?”

“Seriously?” Phil asks and he tries to convey, _God, yes, you too?_ but the intonation comes out all wrong, almost like he’s upset or offended.

Dan’s eyes widen. “No–no–fuck, shit, Phil, I didn’t mean it like _that_ –”

“I didn’t mean it like that either,” Phil cuts him off, frowning. “I get you, I get you completely. If we’re being honest, I’ll admit that it still feels weird waking up next to you in the morning. It's kind of weird. 'Cause I'm still getting used to it, I think? I But yeah, I get you.”

Dan sags against the counter, a mixture of relief and exasperation. “God, Phil. Thank god it's you too and I'm not an asshole. Thought I was being a complete dickhead."

“But you are,” Phil says with a grin. 

Dan sighs fondly and flicks his arm. But before he can pull his arm away, Phil grabs his hand and interlocks their fingers. Dan looks surprised, but hesitantly strokes Phil’s index finger with his thumb. It’s a little more awkward than Phil had anticipated, but Dan laughs and squeezes back anyway.

"Smooth," Dan says. He's grinning now, and his dimple is as deep as Phil's ever seen it. "You gonna kiss me now or something?"

"Yeah, something like that." Phil affirms, leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to the corner of Dan's mouth before meeting his lips properly. 

As their lips touch, Phil thinks that despite the obstacles yet to come, everything is going to be worth it; _Dan_ is worth it. They are gradually relearning each other; how to read each other without a second thought, how to be open around each other, how to _love_ each other. And Phil wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is honestly so weird i haven't written fanfiction since 2012 i'm not even joking ?? having intense war flashbacks to the all the sirius black ff i'm fukcnig cringinG ok cool,, 
> 
> anyway this was written as a part of the phandom little pop with encouragement from [charlie](http://charaonmymind.tumblr.com) (beta) and [elliot](http://rymdarnas.tumblr.com) (doodler) has done some fckin amazing companion art which u can find [here](http://rymdarnas.tumblr.com/post/138208912063/after-spending-almost-a-year-sleeping-without)! 
> 
> slightly inspired by [home](http://http://archiveofourown.org/works/486982) by healing (as mentioned before) as u may be able to tell by the first line and the title is from the kids aren't alright by fall out boy aye
> 
> ok cool i think that's all bye


End file.
